If I Had You
by kingofmischief
Summary: Something was... off. He couldn't really say what it was but something just didn't seem normal. Aside from all the Alien God, Magic, Voodoo, crater thing. "Run a full diagnostic" "What may you be looking for. Sir?" What was he looking for? He should really be calling for back up but his curious side got the better of Tony. There was something very wrong and he had to figure it out.
1. Pathetic

AN: Ooooook this is my first ever fanfic. This is odd, yet in a good way. Please excuse me if it weird, I've never written before and also please don't kill me for that beginning, it's important for the story. *hides*

Also the song for the first part(Loki's) of this chapter is Blinding by Florence and the Machine.

CHAPTER 1 - Pathetic

Pathetic. That what all this really was. Nothing they did would work, no matter how determined or stubborn they acted. You cannot possibly hope to break something that has already been broken down to the smallest bit. You can cause more nightmares, more pain, more trauma, but what is truly the point if it all already existed within him? Nothing, nothing but supposed _"justice"_ as they called it for crimes he committed, half of which to protect the wretched realm he once called _"home"_ and half not because he wanted to, but because he was forced to do them.

Even if he would never admit to this, it still minutely hurt that no one could see that it was not his behavior to perform in such manner. "…Sentimentality" Well, it seems they might had succeeded even if just a little bit if he was feeling such things.

The whip came down again on his bloody back and he held back a whimper. He refused to submit to such pointless acts. He would not give them the satisfaction of seeing him broken, even if he was already so broken that not a speck of what he used to be was left. Broken beyond repair certainly, he thought.

He had truly become what they all had claimed him to be. The God of Chaos, of Lies, of Fire and Destruction, a _Monster_. He laughed but was cut short as another whip came down on his back, or what was left of it, turning his laugh into a gasp he could not hide. _Darn,_ he thought.

He could not see, but sense the hungry grin his abuser was giving. He hated to admit it but he felt fear of the punishments they made him go through. They were pointless but still he feared them. Most of the time he would just fog his mind with the help of a bit of magic so that he would not have to remember what had transpired. But some guards like this one had somehow figured out what he did and managed to get their hands on a few medical potions to clear the mind against magical attacks and would use them to ensure he was on high alert whenever they played with him.

This one in particular, along with a few friends or companions of his, would like to have just a little more fun with him that was necessary. They would love to see him whimper, see him suffer and beg with his eyes, almost never with words, as he refused to submit to them. He feared them the most and they knew it.

"Oh?... did I just hear our precious little darling beg for a little more? Hm?" He felt the guard get closer and place a hand on his shoulder, making him hiss in pain. "Fret not my pretty little dear, our companions are not here today, but I will have a bit of fun with you in their place…" He could feel the predatory grin and hungry eyes as they traveled down his body.

"No… plea…" he bit his tongue but knew the other had heard him and he cursed his bleeding tongue. He had not meant to answer but the fear was overwhelming him slowly each time it happened. He tried and tried and tried to remind himself that he could not be broken further but dread sunk in the bottom of his stomach as the other neared him.

"Yes... Beg little princess, beg until you cannot beg any more. Until your throat is hoarse and then beg some more and maybe, just maybe, I'll let you enjoy it a little... I'll let you enjoy pain like you have never felt it before…"

"DUMMY I SWEAR I WILL DONATE YOU TO A STATE COLLEGE OR SIMPLY SELL YOU FOR SCRAP METAL IF YOU SPRAY ME ONE MORE FREAKING TIME WITH THE DAMN FIRE-EXTINGUISHER!" screamed the engineer to his poor invention.

He had been trying to test his new bracelets that allowed the armor too, not only fly to him when needed but it also had small repulsors that would not burn out after one use. The first few test made his clothes catch fire and left a nasty burn on his left forearm.

He'd been cursing all night. He knew better than to try to work after fighting with Pepper, it always led to bodily harm and that would only make her anger grow but since he had been banned from drinking by her and his AI (traitor) after he had passed out on the fountain in front of his house with the upper part of the suit on, and only boxers on his lower half.

At least he hadn't been stark naked, (ha, he loved using that one whenever he could). But they had insisted that it was wrong and that he needed to stop. Which only led to him try to drink more which led to other accidents and his current ban from anything alcohol and his already unstable relationship with Pepper dissolving back into nothing more than a boss-employee one.

He should probably feel shitty about that but everything had been going downhill since the "Manhattan incident" as everyone called it. Nothing had really changed but everything felt different.

He couldn't really understand it well but after seeing what he saw beyond that portal, after being in space, probably billions of light years away if not for that hole, he just could not see everything around him as before. The sight had been terrifying and it still sent a strong chill down his spine to think about it, it had been the fuel to so many of his nightmares.

He'd been called a genius (except his father) all his life and everyone (except his father) had insisted that the things he created were the most advanced technology the universe had ever seen, and he had been so sure that it was true.

After the incident thought, everything he had known all his life had been thrown back at his face. Aliens, Gods, Alien Gods, it had all been too much for him. It had all seemed so advanced and beyond his reach. But somewhere deep down, buried under all the fear and dread, his scientific side, the engineer and investigator in him had been marveled by the sight.

He wanted to learn more about it, he wanted to understand their machines. He wanted to reverse engineer it all till only scraps were left in his hands, and then he would analyze the scraps as well.

He had also been intrigued by Loki himself, thought he hated this fact. He had been different. He was not like his brother, which of course could be easily explained by him being adopted and from another completely different realm and species and all. But that was not it, he had been different from most people, or being he now knew.

He was cunning, he was merciless and highly intellectual. He had fooled them all. He singlehandedly outsmarted and entire intelligence organization (which wasn't so hard since he had done it a million times) but that was it, he didn't know anyone else who could do it besides himself. The guy (or god, maybe demi-god?) was seriously smart.

Tony hardly ever entitled anyone besides himself as a genius, only Banner and a few others like a Spider Kid he once met. But he was willing to give the damn guy the title even if it made him angry to be cataloged anywhere with him in the list. The guy's head was a bag fun of cats, smart cats but still vicious, melodramatic, diva cats.

 _"Sir, it seems that the satellite picked up a disturbance in space with a 28% similarity to most of Mr. Odinson's recorded travels between realms, yet it's highly unstable, mostly similar with a 72% to his first recorded visit back in New Mexico."_

His first visit? When he was banned and turned mortal? Well, that's odd... Too odd... Ok maybe he was just being slightly paranoid but... "Where J.A.R.V.I.S.?" _"Nevada's desert, Sir."_ Damn, it was a bit of a flight from Malibu... oh well, he'd gone further just for fun. "Prepare my suit J.A.R.V.I.S., I'm kinda bored here and suddenly feel like going to Las Vegas." _"Yes, Sir, spur of the moment and most definitely not just concern or simple paranoia."_

He grinned at one of the cameras on the wall. He couldn't remember _why_ he had decided to program his AI to almost have the same level of sarcasm as his own, probably to entertain himself but sometimes he wish he hadn't. Mostly when the wits were directed towards his creator.

It took a lot less to get to the dessert that normally would. Having his own personal flight system had its great benefits even if it came with the burden of having to be a hero. He slowed down the last few miles so that he could simply enjoy the ride. He had always enjoyed flying. He felt so free, even if he was caged inside the suit. It gave him the feeling that he could go anywhere and do anything he liked. Sure, he knew that it wasn't all that easy, but it still felt good.

He was almost disappointed when his HUD displayed that he had arrived and should stop if he didn't want to just fly over it. But it only lasted a second as he caught sight of the place where a simple alien drawing that marked it as the Bifrost's landing spot should be and only saw a giant crater.

Not good. Not good _at all._ This was not a landing site but a crash one and crashes never meant anything good. Turning the speakers of his suit off he asked his AI in a low voice "J.A.R. … have the Avenger's emergency call ready in case something happens..." _"Already set sir. I'm picking up a faint heat signature from inside the crater. It seems like someone's inside, Sir."_

With that, a small sound came from inside the crater. It sounded like a whimper, an angry one, though, it sounded a bit familiar to Tony but he couldn't really pinpoint from where. He hesitated just a little bit and walked up to the crater and looked inside.

There was certainly a body there but it was covered in burned clothes and skin and blood everywhere. Their skin was pale. A milky white, almost as light as a sheet of paper. They had silky black hair that was slightly wavy but was covered in both dried and fresh blood mixed with dirt.

Half his face was covered by his face but he recognized him after a few moments of admiring his amazingly beautiful body that was sadly covered in dirt and blood. It took him only a moment and then the fear was rooted deep in his spine as he met his eyes, those deep green orbs (hadn't they been blue before?) that lacked recognition of his surroundings but were full of fear and desperation. Tony had never seen him fearful or desperate before thought, but it was unmistakable.

Yet those emotions only lasted mere moments. They developed into rage and hatred and he let out a high-pitched scream, releasing a massive wave of green energy. This knocking the Iron Man off his feet and sent him hurling a few dozen feet away.

"Whoa! What the hell?! J.A.R.V.I.S what happened?!" His HUD had gone crazy, everything was rebooting and his AI didn't answer. Great. He should have taken a battle armor, not his speed one. "J.A.R.V.I.S.? You there buddy? I reeeally need you right now!" Nothing. His suit was running on manual. Just perfect.

A/N: Hoped you enjoyed it! Please, Comment!


	2. Fear

A/N: Constructive criticism would be appreciated! ^.^/

Just please don't kill me, the hardships are necessary for the story. T-T

*Throws chapter and hides*

CHAPTER 2 - Fear

"Whoa! What the hell?! J.A.R.V.I.S what happened?!" His HUD had gone crazy, everything was rebooting and his AI didn't answer. Great. He should have taken a battle armor, not his speed one. "J.A.R.V.I.S.? You there buddy? I reeeally need you right now!" Nothing. His suit was running on manual. Just perfect.

He was offline, with no communications, next to a mass murderer full of magic and crazy. Just peachy. "Just another Sunday morning...". He got up and scanned for heat signatures, expecting Loki would have sneaked up on him, but to his surprise, he was still lying in the center of that crater, odd.

Carefully he approached the scene and with a little bit of hesitance, peeked into the hole and hid again. Sadly, way too fast to really see anything. "Ooook… One more time…" Once again he peeked in and saw that Loki had not moved an inch. The God was still lying on the ground, limbs facing awkward directions, probably broken, hair over his face, blood, and dirt everywhere. He couldn't really see if he was breathing for where he stood.

"Well, I'm royally screwed, either way, if he faking or not, if my communications are down so...". A bit reluctantly, he stood up and went down into the hole, as carefully and silent as he could, which, was not much considering he was in a giant metal suit. _"Sir, systems are back online, shall I call the Avengers for backup?"_ "Gimme a sec J.A.R.V.I.S. Not yet"

Something was... off. He couldn't really say what it was but something just didn't seem normal, aside from all the Alien God, Magic, Voodoo, crater thing. "Run a full diagnostic"

 _"_ _What may you be looking for. Sir?"_ What was he looking for? He should really be calling for back up by now, but something was strange and his curious side got the better of him.

"Damage, exterior and internal. Also, run a test to compare his current magic readings with S.H.I.E.L.D.'s and our own records." - _"How would you have me to hack into S.H.I.E.L.D.'s databanks? Subtly or quickly?"_ Good question. Did he want to alert SHIELD of Loki's reappearance? Why wouldn't he? "Make it subtly, still wanna check a few things myself before the Angry Pirate gets his hook on him"

 _"_ _Very well Sir."_ It amused him how much emotion his AI could imitate, he could have sworn he heard the programmed British voice bemused at its creator's joke.

 _"_ _Sir, Mr. Loki seems to suffer severe internal bleeding, some of his organs are barely functioning, he has 3 broken ribs, one collapsed lung, his left arm is dislocated and broken in different sectors, including his wrist. His rectum is severely wounded and bleeding. Also, he has suffered head trauma, a concussion most likely and is on the verge of consciousness."_

"Damn, he got beat up pretty good... But he can heal it all with some magic, right?" Loki could always fix things with his magic, right? _"The test you issued comparing the magical readings S.H.I.E.L.D. and our own databanks gathered and his current readings suggest he will not be able to, Sir. His magical powers are significantly lower by 87%. If treatment is not administered with the utmost urgency, he will die"_

"Shit... Well, I can't just let him die… Call my jet and the medic guys, give them my coordinates but don't tell them who the patient is yet and make them swear to that doctor's confidentiality shit. Oh and Bruce, get him in on the jet as well. Actually, call him. Tell the meds and jet that I need them here with their equipment ASAP." Ordered Tony. _"Shall I contact Ms. Potts as well?"_ \- "No, not yet, don't need her worrying about this mess." He had inconvenienced her far too much already. He would keep her out of this as long as he could. _"Dr. Banner is on the line."_

"Tony? What's going on? Why am I being rushed to a jet?" Answered his friend as a greeting. "You have that doctor/patient confidentiality bullshit thing, right?" The line was silent for a moment and Tony could feel the sweat going down his spine.

"I'm not really a doctor, Tony, I just have a doctorate, but yeah, I still do the doctor/patient confidentiality bullshit… Now tell me what you did and what I have to fix before you break even more." Ouch. "It's not me, this time, Bruce…"

"Oh no… it's always something bad when you use my name and not just some nickname…" Bruce knew him too well. "Well, you could say that… I need you to keep this a secret tho, from everyone, even the Avengers and e _specially_ from S.H.I.E.L.D."

"Tony…" Oh no. That motherly tone again. "No, you can't tell anyone. Promise me Brucie, this is important and serious and you know when I say it, it's probably double the important and serious cause I normally refuse use those words together unless it's in bed and a joke." Silence, again. _Come on Bruce, I need you…_ "Alright, alright, I promise…"

"Great! Now get here as soon as possible, he's kinda dying" Bruce rushed with questions but Tony didn't want to deal with them right now and decided to end the call. "Wait, what do you mean dying?! Who's dyin-"

Silence filled once again the air around Tony but was soon disturbed by his own sigh. What was he doing? He didn't know. Why was he doing it? That, he also didn't know and did _not_ want to think about.

He opened his faceplate and crouched down next to the limp body that was slowly breathing. "I hope you're grateful, pal, I should just let you die right there." A small cough and a whimpering sound escaped the bloody mouth. "you conscious there reindeer games?"

"Yes mortal, now shut your mou-" Another cough. "wow slow down princess, you don't wanna strain yourself any more than you already have." Slowly he places a hand on the shoulder that looks not-broken but immediately the body under him flinches away.

"Get away! Don't dare call me that and don't you touch me!" Tony lifts his hand in a show of innocence and backs away slowly. "I won't hurt you, calm down." There was something really wrong.

Those eyes, besides being a different color, which he could have sworn used to be blueish, they were full of fear. Fear he hadn't seen back in his penthouse. Fear he hadn't seen when they defeated the royal pain and sent him back to Asgard in chains. Something happened in fairy land that planted on a being that was so prideful, so powerful, so regal and honestly, beautiful, fear in its rawest form. He couldn't understand why but he hated whatever made those eyes change.

Loki had done horrible things, yes, had killed millions, but even after all that, whatever they had done to him in Asgard, just seemed like too much. It seemed wrong and deep inside of him a sort of protective feeling grew. He wanted to beat the crap out of whoever had done what they did to Loki.

"Look, I need you to stay still, you'll only hurt yourself more if you fight me." A small chuckle fell from the bloodied lips. "And pray tell, wh-why would you care Stark?" He could recognize _and_ remember Tony? Loki was obviously struggling, trying to not look as bad as he did, but was failing miserably. "Hey, Genius, Billionaire, Playboy, Philanthropist, Hero. Those last two meaning I help people who need it."

"I d-do not want your help… Now allow me to rot at my own leisure..." More coughs full of blood. "You may not want it, but you sure as hell need it, honey."

Well, he had imagined this would come back to bite him but he hadn't expected it this soon and from the guy he was trying to help. Sigh. "J.A.R.V.I.S. gimme ETA on the jet." He needed Bruce, and alcohol, lots, and lots of alcohol. _"17 minutes with 45 seconds, Sir."_ Great. Enough time for a quickie but far too long for waiting with nothing to do but talk to someone who shouldn't and doesn't want to talk.

A grunt caught his attention. Loki was trying to move again. "Hey, I told you not to move!" Quickly he grabbed his not-broken shoulder to try to stop him from moving. _Big_ mistake. Loki started to scream and thrash violently, sending green magic whips that pricked Tony's armor softly. "Whoa! Stop! You're making everything worst!"

"Stop touching me! Get away! I don't want this! I ca-cant anymore! Stop! Plea-please…" and then it all stopped. He went limp, he would have seemed dead, except for the rough breathing and his open eyes. "What the fuck? Loki? Ahh, hey, you there, Buddy?"

No response. He was awake but his mind seemed to be somewhere completely different. His eyes, seeing something unseen, distant and dull. They had lost their splendor. Eyes that reminded Tony of a predator who hungrily looked at his prey and knew well just how powerful and frightening he was, now looked like the eyes of the prey they would normally hunt. They looked resigned. Like all hope had been lost.

Was he thinking that Tony would do the same they had done to him back in Viking land? The ragged breathing slowed down to a forced and utterly fake calm. It hurt, hurt to see someone he had once feared and respected, an alien, a God, turn into something so pitiful.

This was just pathetic. He couldn't stand it. "Look, I don't know what they did to you back in Ass-land, but here, you'll be under my protection. As Cheesy as it sounds, I won't hurt you and I won't let anyone else hurt you. You got that? So calm your shit down and let me help you." No response. "You still with me Rudolph?" He moved to get a better look but he just got a flinch in response.

Another sigh. "Fine, stay there, I'll stay here, don't talk, but my guys are coming to help so you better cooperate with them at least." This time, Loki moved his head slightly to look directly at Tony's eyes. He was searching for something, but Tony couldn't tell what it was he searched. After a few moment of staring at each other, he appeared to have found what he looked for and closed his eyes. Tony kept looking at his face and saw the tense muscles there slowly relax and his breathing calm down to a worrisome pace as he drifted into unconsciousness. _"Sir, ETA is 1 minute with 27 seconds."_ Finally, he could hear the roar of the approaching jet in the distance. He stood up and climbed out of the crater to receive the medics and his science bro.

"We have arrived at the given coordinates. Please wait till the transport lands safely to disembark." He was nervous, to say the least. Tony had sounded a mix of many things. He sounded a bit concerned, desperate and scared, but also a little mad and spiteful. What could have caused him to feel all this? What happened? Who was hurt? And why wouldn't he just tell him? He knew he would regret to know those answers and he should not have agreed to keep it a secret.

He knew he would regret to know those answers and he should not have agreed to keep it a secret. But this was Tony, the guy who had helped him so much after the Manhattan incident. His science partner. He could be excessively reckless from time to time but he hadn't failed him yet. There was always a reason behind what he did, even if it was a stupid ass reason.

Heh, he was certainly adapting some things from Tony. He was using more slang and insults that he usually would. He was also starting to appreciate his jokes, puns, and wit. He had to admit he's really taken a liking to the engineer, no matter how infuriating he can be. He certainly has charm. "Dr. Banner, ready to disembark?"

"Huh? Oh! Yeah, I'm coming, let me just get my bag." Quickly he got his bag and followed the doctors out of the jet. Just outside he could make out the shape of the Iron Man suit with its faceplate up, showing inside its proud creator. Wearing a smile, Tony waved at them.

To anyone else that didn't know Tony well, it would have seemed like he had not a care in the world and was enjoying himself, but to Bruce, it showed concern. Bruce had learned to see through Tony's façade. He could see some of the emotions his science partner tried to hide.

"Hey, Brucie! Soo remember our friendly neighborhood alien overlord? The horny Rudolph?" Ignoring Tony, Bruce passed him and looked inside the crater, next to the other medics who all had shocked expressions. He couldn't believe his eyes. It had been almost a year since Loki and Thor had left for Asgard. But somehow the younger god was here.

He looked horribly injured. The doctor in him told him to hurry and help but another part of him was trying to hold back the hulk. This man had killed millions, had destroyed so many lives, had caused so much damage. And now he was here and Tony wanted to help him? "Tony, what is this? What did you do? Why is he here?"

"Well, I didn't do anything for once and what happened? Honestly? I don't know." "This is bad Tony. _Really_ bad."

A/N: Sorry T.T


End file.
